Couples Therapy
Because you shouldn’t feel lonely when you’re with another person
When we don't feel seen or understood in our most intimate partnerships, the pain can feel overwhelming…and incredibly lonely. Many couples find themselves caught in cycles where one partner's hurt triggers the other's defenses, leading to patterns that seem impossible to break. You might feel deeply alone even while sitting next to someone you love - perhaps because your partner struggles to hold space for your feelings, or because neither of you feels truly heard.
The irony is that often our deepest wounds surface with the people we love most, making relationship struggles particularly heartbreaking.
“Are you longing to feel seen and understood in your vulnerability, valued and considered in your needs, and connected at the core with your partner?”
There is a way back to connection
I work by integrating two complementary methodologies - Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO) - that offer hope and pathways toward healing and connection.
Both approaches recognize that simply talking about our feelings isn't enough, and that even taking that first step can feel like a far reach when stuck in difficult cycles. Going beyond insight alone, these approaches create space for couples to slow down and experience emotions in new ways, laying the groundwork for deeper understanding and lasting change.
Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO)
IFIO brings the wisdom of Internal Family Systems (IFS) to relationship work. This approach recognizes that we all have different "parts" within us - some that protect us when we feel threatened, and others that carry vulnerability. When life experiences wound us, our protective parts often take extreme measures to keep us safe. In relationships, this might look like withdrawing to avoid rejection or attacking to prevent abandonment. IFIO helps partners understand these protective dynamics in themselves and each other, reducing blame and embodying new patterns as they emerge.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
EFT draws on attachment theory's insight that humans are wired for connection. It helps couples recognize how their conflict cycles hijack their natural capacity for bonding. By identifying the vulnerable emotions beneath defensive behaviors, partners learn to turn toward each other as allies with a shared goal of strengthening these bonds rather than adversaries engaged in a losing battle.
Experiences I Specialize In
Mixed neurotype partnerships where one partner is neurodivergent and the other is neurotypical or where both partners are neurodivergent but have different sensory, communication, and processing needs
LGBTQIA+ couples seeking to explore the impact of internalized gender roles on their dynamic
Cross-cultural couples where differing cultural backgrounds can create obstacles to true understanding
Life transitions and their impact on relationships
External stressors affecting connection
Evolving intimacy needs over time
These diverse relationships can benefit from IFIO's non-pathologizing view of protective strategies alongside EFT's nuanced understanding of how neurotype, cultural background, and external stressors shape attachment needs and expressions of closeness. When there is space to explore the deeply embedded roots around emotional expression, communication, and intimacy in partnership, partners can bring more intentionality around how they both honor those roots and branch out to create their own ways of connecting.
My approach also honors the nervous system's role in relationship dynamics. By helping partners regulate their emotional states - by accessing rather than suppressing the parts holding these emotions - therapy creates the safety needed for vulnerable sharing and deep listening. This allows couples to step out of triggering patterns and access their natural capacity for compassion and understanding.
Together we can support your unique relationship
When we find ourselves stuck in painful relationship patterns, it's easy to lose hope. But combining the wisdom of EFT and IFIO offers a powerful path forward. By understanding our protective parts, honoring our attachment needs, and learning to navigate emotion together, couples can move beyond cycles of disconnection toward the deeply fulfilling relationships they desire.
With attuned therapeutic support, partners can transform their triggers into opportunities for growth and their pain into deeper understanding. The journey isn't always easy, but the possibility of genuine connection to all parts within us and within our partners ultimately makes it worthwhile.